A recent meme making the rounds is a declaration of intent stating that one did NOT start an online journal just to invoke group pity parties in some small attempt to fill the holes in one's soul with the sympathy of others. Quite frankly that was NEVER what this LJ was (or is) about. Every once in awhile people will offer support, and (hell yes) it's totally appreciated. I think once (maybe twice) in the last 3 and a half years I've called out for some sort of solace from the few dozen that read this mess that vaguely resembles my life -- but I think that's different. I needed help, and asked for it, rather than whining until people start soothing me with comments that can all be loosely translated to "poor baby!"
Hell, when I usually post about the weird/bad/intense stuff, most of the time I'm marveling at my own stupidity, bad timing, or the humor of even the worst that could happen. For example, yesterday I was working on a repair at work, replacing an internal cable of an eMac. Sounds simple... except that just to disconnect one end of the cable you had to dismantle half the computer and chip off old hot glue, and the other was snaked in alongside the CRT (think TV tube, non-techs!), between it and a heat sink... oh, and cable tied and glued at the other end as well.
I already had managed to cut a knuckle against some metal inside the case, and had finally gotten the new cable connected and glued on one end. That left the other end needed to be glued... except there was no way the hot glue gun could possibly fit to glue the other end. So, using a disposable plastic tool, I placed a gob of glue on the end and went to paste it down. However, the opposite end of the stick caught on the aforementioned heat sink, and the glob flipped up and landed on the back of my left hand.
I should mention that this isn't the low temp hot glue guns a lot of people use for crafts. Children can usually deal with those without risk of serious injury. This, however, was a high temperature glue gun, so even though the glue was several seconds from the tip, it was still hot enough to be considered "molten".
If you've ever burnt a finger or hand on something... a hot stove or some such... what's your first reflex? (Those of you already laughing, let the others get the full impact of what happens next."
Mine, for what it's worth, it to raise the burned bit to my mouth. Only the hot glue was still molten.
That's right... I hot glued my hand to my mouth.
(waits for the laughter to die down)
Worse, it was the inside of my upper lip. I immediately surmised my mistake. With a muffled "what a dumbass move!" I pulled my hand away as quickly as possible.
The damage is actually pretty minor... a small blister on the back of my hand, and a slightly larger one inside my mouth. D'oh!
But that's not why I'm writing this post.
I wanted to talk about New Year's eve, and the weird thing that happened on the way to the sex party in SF.
Roni and I had decided to pick up some new toys for the party, and thus made a pilgrimage to Good Vibes on Valencia and 17th. It was pouring, but there was plenty of parking on 17th after we made the right off of Valencia, which was unheard of.
As we were walking toward the store, I thought I saw something odd up toward the intersection. Ever have the sensation when you're looking at something, and you can see things, but your mind hasn't quite parsed the information? That's the basis of the double take... you see something, turn away, and THEN you realize what you saw.
Since this was in full view as we walked forward, I experienced not so much a double take as a sudden surge.
Poor Roni had no idea what it was I had seen... my first reaction, "What the fuck?", didn't do much to clarify things. It didn't help that my brain was too busy processing information to come up with anything wittier, so my second "What the FUCK!" (at which I broke into a run) was no better.
What I had seen was a guy lying down in the street, trying to stand (but not being able to). Another guy was holding an umbrella over him, trying to dial a cell phone with one hand. The "click" was realizing that the guy in the road wasn't goofing around... he had just been struck by a car.
A few moments latter I was holding the umbrella as people formed a sort of cordon around us to keep cars from hitting anyone else. The car that had struck him was still at the corner, the driver in a complete panic. To their credit, paramedics and cops were there in about three minutes. Of course, there WAS a police station there on the corner (yes, across from the sex toy shop), but still...
The man down was in shock. He was too calm, and his left leg was bent in a way I knew wasn't natural -- it was probably broken. The guy kept trying to get up (endorphins can make you feel just fine... for awhile), but we told his to keep as still as possible.
After the cops arrived, the rain stopped, so I put down the umbrella and wished everyone luck... and went to buy a double ended dildo and other goodies with Roni. (I can highly recommend the Feeldoe, by the way).
There's more, but it will have to wait.