Yohannon (yohannon) wrote,

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Journal and Run...

Well, it would seem that the after-effects of my Saturday Night Purge (no, not THAT way...thank goddess! I *hate* vomiting. If I do, it's something really bad...or the Barf Witch Project. But that was an aberration. Really. ) were not as temporary as I feared...over the last two days I think I've accomplished more house work, yard work, assorted management of my assorted daily issues than the previous 5 months. And during the new moon, yet! (Thanks to my friend Laura for pointing that one out! :)

I just found out my friend Lori's got a Live journal...and another, Scuba, has one as well. Lori I was able to add as a friend, but it doesn't look like Scuba's got hers up yet. I suspect that most of my dearest friends and lovers will have them before years end...this may actually BE the next thing after all!

I wonder if it's the unique nature of journals that is lending itself to this medium. I know it works for me because I can go off about anything...any topic, mundane or not. I don't have to tilt my prose for an audience, nor do I have to deal with responses. Even better, I feel like I can really cut loose with my writing, no longer concerned of the "shut down" effect I tend to inspire -- that curious phenom where I write a message so well it intimidates everyone into not saying anything.

Yes, that does sound arrogant. But it really happens... I had no idea, until I queried people, face to face, as to why they didn't post more when-ever I posted something to a particular thread. When they said (for the most part) that they felt I had said anything they would have, only better, it was the worst sort of frustration: When I run a discussion group, e-list, or whatever, I'm trying to STIMULATE dialog...not shoot it dead.

So I began to deliberately screw up my arguments. Left gaping holes in my logic large enough to fit my biggest lovers through (snort!). It worked, but it left a certain emptiness inside me. I may be the only one who enjoys my writing when I get going, but at least it's complete to MY eye.

But the monologue gives me a freedom to be as obnoxious, overbearing, gross, or even incomplete as I want to be.


I was interested in something that K'Shandra posted as a comment to an entry by one of her friends...to be honest, I'm not sure how I stumbled into it myself (the whole live-journal structure completely rocks that way)...in which he posted a picture of people leaping from the WTC on 911. His take on it was fascinating...however, K' was shocked by it. The argument was that should have been tucked away using the...I think it's a LJ split tag. To protect people who may have added him as a friend, and thus would be unable to avoid the picture when reviewing their friends entries.

I'm not sure I completely agree. I understand her point: I was stunned by the picture. But I wonder if I would have ever had the courage to look at it in the first place. Yes, I know these posts are "public"...anyone can see them, at any time. Yet I persist in the notion that, if this journal is to be effective for my purposes, to not hold back my feelings.

I suspect there will be times I use the "Friends" setting for items that I really don't want to broadcast...I might even see a need for "private" for those times when I feel truly tortured to some degree that i have yet to encounter. Actually, maybe I should look at the LJ code and see how hard it would be to add the ability to create different groupings of friends, and security levels to match. That would be a cool feature. Of course, I should be careful...part of the risk of my current mania is the very real possibility of taking on too much...in fact, I should be asleep right now (it's after five AM...goddess!). I should finish this later today...I would actually like to talk about something that has JUST happened. Ambar once accused me (in an LJ entry, come to think! :) of being a "raconteur". Personally, I think I just ramble aimlessly and find exactly the place I didn't realize I was looking for...until I got there, of course.
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