Tonight I see dragonwitchling for (probably) the last time ere she departs to Chicago. I have no doubt I'll see her again -- after all, she's too maddening not to re-appear in my life. Considering the other relationships I've had in my life, she's by no means the "worst"*.
Somehow I had to plan this without knowing for sure she was actually going to make it from Sacramento until about 2 this afternoon. I managed to get us a room by the airport (there is a baffling dearth of rooms tonight -- makes me wonder what's in town) without spending an arm and a leg.
I hate the fact she's leaving the area -- it feels like losing yet another link to Faire, and (in many ways) to Linda Underhill. I know that's not true, especially when you take perlandria and assorted faire folk at Perforce into account... but emotional reactions are hardly rational.
And no, I can't fault her: She's doing something I had to do back in 1987, when I made my own escape from New York to... well, here. It's something that, in many ways, I hopes she would be able to do one day -- somehow break free from the lopsided familial obligations that were all take, and little to no give.
But it's Solstice, and I refuse to be depressed on the longest day. If I do have a touch of that Seasonal Disorder that lack of sun induces, then I'll be darned if I STILL have seasonal lapses when the order of the day is heat and sun. I know it's nothing Like Phoenix (High Temp: 110!!), It's not supposed to hit 90 in Alameda.
I know... "Freakin' 'Wah'".
I was recently told by Kim that she would be just fine with me posting stories and pics of her in fat_sex or fat_bdsm -- I'm going to check with people to determine specifically when I can write about things, and how revealing as to identity I can be. Kim's pretty much open, but I know a few people who probably won't have issues with erotic tales told with an eye toward discretion when it comes to helping the Mrs. Grundy's of the world to determine who the purveyors of indecency are. I think I'll post such missives here locked to my TMI filter (speak now if you wish to be insulated from such salacious details!) and locked to the membership of the fat_ groups (which means if you're not a friend OR not in the TMI filter here, you'll have to become a member their to read up on the fun).
So yes, maybe I HAVE been a bit of a "tease" when it comes to such subjects lately. I think I was so burned by people who seemed to freak at the prospect of somehow being "outted" that I, in typical Yo fashion, went to the other extreme.
Well, I have been spending this year trying to get back on track. The conversion of the lists to blogs has been moving along nicely, Chez Watt is feeling more like we've actually finished moving in, and slowly I'm finding my identity again. Not a bad way to find one self mid-way through the wheel of the year.
Blessed Be, y'all!
* Though using words like "worst" when talking about people you love always provides hours of fun when I'm asked to explain myself. To clarify, ALL relationships have their trying moments. At least my most difficult issue with dragonwitchling is that she was almost impossible to get to see more than a couple of times a year.